In the future we'll all be gay
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
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