Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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