I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
Randomize
