Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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