Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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