4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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