well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
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