that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
