fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
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