David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
