You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Randomize
