Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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