I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
