whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
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