you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
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