We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Randomize
