Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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