A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
