you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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