That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Let's paint friendship bongs
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
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