Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize
