So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Randomize