you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
