Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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