So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
