No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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