Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Randomize
