Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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