My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
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