batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
