lets start a swedish sibling band together
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Randomize
