We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
Randomize
