Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
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