of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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