I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Randomize