it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
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