What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
Randomize