"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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