i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
