hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
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