just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Randomize
