Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
