im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
