FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
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