Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
it's like iHOP with fire
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
