nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize
