She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Randomize
