I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
So much Jack, so little girl.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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