Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
