using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
