i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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