worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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