Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
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