just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
